Losing–and Finding–My Passion

Do you ever feel like a fraud? I was starting to feel like a writing impostor.  I’d been a freelance writer for many years and I was becoming tired of it all–not so much the actual writing but all of the stuff that goes with it: the seemingly endless work of finding markets, pitching to editors, waiting for answers, and then, if that all went well, waiting to get paid. I wanted, no, I needed, to get out of this loop. I’d lost my passion for the work, and in this game, if you’re not passionate about the writing then the rest becomes a chore. I wrote a few articles and really tried to stoke the fire but I had to let it all go, including this blog. I couldn’t really call myself a writer anymore.

What was I though?

I’d always loved sharing my passion for writing with others and really enjoyed the time I’d spent with my writing group, but how could I teach others about writing when my heart wasn’t in it?

I still wanted to teach though and enjoyed teaching a fitness class at the Seniors Outreach Services (SOS) centre in Napanee.  I’d made new friends, they enjoyed my class, and I was improving my own fitness at the same time. With the support of the program director I’d changed my class from low-impact strength training into a strength-and-stretch class. The new program was inspired by Essentrics®.  I had a new passion: learn this program well enough to teach it. As I moved along on my Eccentric Journey I became more enthusiastic. The Essentrics® program evolved and there are now two tracks for instructors. The Aging Backwards® stream is perfect for me.  I know how much it will continue to help me and the people in my classes and anyone who needs a gentler exercise program because of chronic pain or injury. I received my certification as an Essentrics Aging Backwards® instructor in December 2019.

I now teach three or four classes a week and I love it!

As my enthusiasm for teaching Essentrics® grew, a funny thing happened: I found the passion for writing again. Now I want to write articles about health and fitness and specifically how we can all “age backwards” and take better care of ourselves. I want to share what I’ve learned and tap into the knowledge of others. I won’t even mind the pitch-wait-write-wait-loop again. I want to help other writers promote the work they are passionate about, so I will be posting more book reviews here. Check the Captions Communications page on my website for more news about my writing.

My passion for freelance work is also fueled by the fact that there will be a new Canadian Freelance Guild launching in May 2020. My writers’ organization, the Professional Writers Association of Canada, is a founding partner. Being a member of this new organization will help my work as an independent writer and Essentrics Aging Backwards® instructor.

I no longer feel like a fraud or an impostor. I am a fitness leader. I am a writer. Sometimes these two passions will come together. I will continue to write about them both with more passion, which I seem to have lost but now have found once more.

What’s your passion? How do you fuel it? What do you do when you start to feel like you’re losing it? Please let me know.

8 thoughts on “Losing–and Finding–My Passion

  1. So glad you are back as both a writer and fitness instructor. I wish I could re-capture my passion for writing. Lately I have been writing in a journal for my own use but hope it will trigger the desire to rekindle my desire to write fiction. In the mean time I am enjoying the Aging Backwards class; at least I am working on my fitness level.

    1. Thank you Lillie. I’d lost my interest in even writing in my journal. That’s a good place to get ideas down and just keep writing. Glad to hear that you are doing that. I hope it does rekindle your desire to write and good for you for venturing into the fiction genre from non-fiction. I am so happy you are in my class and happy to hear that you are enjoying it.

  2. Nice to see you back, and doing something that has stirred your passion. But you’re still a writer whether you get paid for it or not, right? This sounds like an excellent program. Wish I lived closer and could see it in process. Maybe one day I can visit Napanee on a day that you teach.

    1. Hi Judy,
      Yes, it is nice to be writing again. It wasn’t so much that I didn’t have the paid work, nor the energy to go after it, I’d lost interest in doing any writing at all. So it is nice to have that interest re-kindled. Essentrics is an excellent program. I’d love to have you join my class sometime or I could come up and teach you and a group of friends.

  3. Great post, Christine. As we continue our writing journeys, we all develop unique ways to further our goals and fuel our passions. Like you, I have combined my passion for the world of chocolate and cacao with my writing. But that has led to more of my income being generated from my teaching chocolate workshops, hosting chocolate events, and speaking at chocolate conferences and expos than it does from writing articles and books. All that boils down to us being qualified experts in our chosen fields. So don’t ever think of yourself as a fraud or non-writer just because your work activities have been diverted from straight writing to other related sources of income. Think of it as a tree blossoming from the fertilizer and care we have given it as it grows, and that we are now enjoying the fruits of our labour.

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words of support, Doreen. I really do feel that I am blossoming in another area. I am so proud of you for all that you’ve been doing and you’ve shown by example how one passion feeds another.

  4. Hi, Christine!

    I am a former ballet dancer and ballet instructor for 39 years. I walked away for several years but then had a yen to return ro teaching. Even though I did my best creative work at that time, the magic had gone out. I wanted to reach adult instead. All the while, I was following Miranda Esmonde-White and Classical stretch. I segued into a caregivimg career and then discovered Aging Backwards
    I have found a niche for my clients and myself! I am pursuimg Cert 1. Deborah

    1. Hi Deborah, How wonderful that you are back to teaching. Aging Backwards fits so beautifully with a caregiving career as you will take care of your clients and yourself with this program. Best of luck with your certification. It is a wonderful journey, no matter how you follow it.

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